I‘m eagerly walking towards my friend Stinger to give him a hug and grab my credentials. We’re part of a handful of r/UFOs moderators who were invited to the 10th annual Contact in the Desert conference and able to make the event. It was a great opportunity, this being the largest UFO conference in the world which attracts a few thousand curious people such as ourselves to Indian Wells, a small resort town east of Los Angeles each year. This city is a series of concrete walls shielding gated communities and golf courses, which makes it feel more suited for rich retirees or people with an excess of khakis. There’s a unique element floating here though too, it being just south of Joshua Tree and places like the Integratron or Institute of Metaphysics.

I had been to Contact in the Desert only once before in 2017. I volunteered that year in exchange for a free ticket, but the work schedule I was expected to fill caused me to miss most of the presentations and panels I would have otherwise attended. I also went alone, which all combined made it far less enjoyable than I hoped. All I felt I took away was an oversized volunteer shirt and a sense of missed opportunity.

I was very excited to have people I knew and worked with here this time, even if some of us had not yet met in person before. Our press passes also granted us access to all the talks, workshops, and intensives, which meant the only limitation to our experience was how long we could stand sitting each day taking in Powerpoint slides.

Stinger and I waste little time catching up and head into the first presentation by Paul Hynek, son of the famous J. Allen Hynek. He’s giving a lecture titled Ufology 101 which we assume will function as a broad introduction to the phenomenon. We haven’t heard Paul speak before and are eager to see what he has prepared.

Taking a look around the conference hall, I immediately noticed the median age here skews well over fifty. This is further reinforced throughout the day by the recurring sound of default ringtones which interrupt each talk about every ten minutes. One person even answers their phone and we hear a confused caller on the other end just ten rows away from us. The audience laughs at how awkward this exchange is, but Paul can’t manage to tell what people are laughing at, so he tries to move on.

The presentation is lukewarm, probably because Stinger and I are not the intended audience, having been familiar with the subject matter for quite some time already. The following talk is on artificial intelligence, but the speaker can’t make it and Paul is asked to fill in. We decide to skip part of it in lieu of dinner since we both work in technology and are expecting it to be equally underwhelming.

We hurry back to find Paul on stage with someone from the audience who he has speaking to ChatGPT via his phone. The person doesn’t appear to understand the purpose of the exercise or ChatGPT and begins relating their personal perspectives on UFOs as though they’re trying to convince us of something. It reminds me of the special awkwardness only conventions similar to this can truly manifest. I decide to dip out until the next presentation.

Stephen Basset eventually comes on to discuss ‘Disclosure 101’, which is his general overview of the government’s ability (or inability) to admit their level of involvement in and understanding of the UFO phenomenon. Stephen is a longtime activist for this specific issue and a paragon in the community, so we’re looking forward to it.

Unfortunately, the talk is overshadowed by constant audio issues and his having not prepared any form of presentation. At one point his phone goes off, but he tries to make light of it. After feeling like we’re not hearing anything new and the ongoing interruptions, I begrudgingly suggest we call it a night. I leave hoping the following day is more stimulating and less frustrating.

It’s a new day and we’re all nestled within a ring of couches in the hotel atrium. Richard Geldrich is giving us a rapid-fire version of his upcoming presentation and looking for our feedback. I’m furiously taking notes, overloaded by new aspects of UFO history I was completely ignorant of until twenty minutes ago. Richard is remarkably methodical in his approach and he stops politely to answer our questions or fill in gaps, all while spinning an increasingly captivating ball of yarn.

At a certain point, some things are said in hushed tones and off the record. His friend turns to me and jokingly asks, “Has Richard accused you of being a CIA plant yet?” I soon learn the definition of ‘going on thick ice’, which involves entering the public sphere in such a way as to insulate yourself from actions by bad actors, similar to David Grusch’s recent actions over the past year. We’re each encouraged to be extremely skeptical of everyone in the field and to trust no one.

It’s so engrossing we skip the talk we planned to attend previously without even discussing it. I’m so firehosed by the presentation that it’s unclear what the best threads to be pulling on are. It also becomes intimidatingly apparent Richard is one of the best researchers in the field, as he’s been organizing data from multiple UFO databases to open source them and scouring the latest databases of newly digitized newspaper clippings for original leads and observations. Unfortunately, Richard has relegated himself mostly to UFO Twitter, despite it being an unmoderated mess of noise and divisiveness. We collectively try to nudge him to do an Ask Me Anything (AMA) on the subreddit at some point, but he’s hesitant.

At one point he notices I haven’t said anything at all yet and I realize I have to say something interesting or come off as a spook. I ask him what points we should be helping him dig further into. He points towards the growing newspaper database and notes of Frank Scully as holding some of the most significant gems that have yet to be fully mined. He says it was harder to suppress information completely during the era of print media and many things leaked or can now be illustrated by analyzing them in the aggregate.

Eventually, we have to leave to see a presentation, but we end up greatly enjoying all the time we get to spend with Richard throughout the conference. I depart the conversation with a pile of notes and a sense I have a great deal of homework to do.

I’m in a dimly lit conference room sitting with three other r/UFOs moderators, pondering the strange set of life choices that has led each of us here. We’re listening to Thomas Jane, best known for his roles in shows and films such as The Expanse and The Punisher, pontificate on how he got his big break as a teenager in a Bollywood film. Stephen Bassett slouches next to him in dark sunglasses, occasionally dropping in to opine about his attempts to facilitate UFO disclosure from within Hollywood. This isn’t a lecture; they’re mostly meandering through wherever cadre of questions gets blurted out by a handful of bold audience members.

I’m eager to hear more of Thomas’ story, as he said only a couple of months ago he felt like he was finally coming out of the UFO closet. He seems exceptionally relaxed to be here riffing with us, occasionally taking long drags on a cigar-shaped vape like we’re lounging on a beach just reminiscing. Interestingly, Thomas doesn’t mention his personal experiences with the phenomenon at any point, despite having alluded to them in recent interviews. Instead, they focus more on their non-profit, the Hollywood Disclosure Alliance, which is an attempt to create a network of figures similar to themselves to better inform and consult with Hollywood regarding the reality of UFOs.

During the discussion, I’m reminded of how difficult it is for any of us to fully grasp the context and value of these conversations, much less what is fundamentally going on with the phenomenon as a whole. This is just one talk amongst several happening simultaneously in other areas of the conference and I realize everyone will have a very different experience of the weekend based on what they choose to attend. I still leave this talk feeling it wasn’t very informative, aside from finally gaining some sense of how COVID unfortunately killed the last season of The Expanse.

Richard Dolan reaches out to shake my hand as I approach his table. I immediately offer him a silver Sharpie and politely ask if he’d be willing to sign a photograph of himself I’ve printed out beforehand.

He has the same sort of stunned appreciation he did several years ago when I did the same thing after stumbling into him outside one of his own talks in Winnipeg, Canada. Two women behind him each start taking pictures of him signing it while he regales me with the story of where and when the photograph was taken.

I’m having trouble retaining his words and I’m doing everything in my power to not act too Troy Barnes over our interaction. I try to reference my meeting him the first time, but I do it too quietly and he’s too absorbed in whatever he’s writing to register what I’ve said. I insist he keeps my marker since I purchased it only for this singular event and I noticed his wasn’t working beforehand. I then decide to exit the conversation early without giving him my card, asking why he never answered any of my emails, or if he might be interested in doing an AMA on the subreddit at any point.

I float over to my friends who are standing nearby, but who weren’t supervising the conversation. When I explain what happened they’re confused I didn’t ask him for an AMA, but I know I’m more content with my newly signed photograph even if I can’t decipher what he wrote yet. I still want to try asking him myself so I verbally commit to cornering him later in the week and trying again.

Henry Zebrowski is rolling onto the stage, refusing to use his knees, as he returns from chasing audience members who chose to walk out of the panel early. He’s part of The Last Podcast on the Left and they’re giving us a deep-dive on their favorite UFO shapes in the least serious way possible. Their podcast covers a range of things from true crime to strange and scary, but the ten percent focused on UFOs are the best and what I’ve sought out eagerly for years.

Henry’s co-hosts, Marcus Parks and Ed Larson, appear to be content observing his uncaged energy erupt unchecked alongside the rest of us, as he fully enters his element amongst UFO heathens. We’re hardly five minutes in and they’ve already cut deep into 9/11 conspiracies and Freedom Tower fleshlights. It’s the absurd form of levity I need after multiple days of drinking in complex and unabating ninety-minute monologues while surrounded by old people. Henry laments how little laughter is often present in ufology today, even if the implications carry a heavy weight and undertones of ontological shock.

They fumble through videos with various UFO-shaped blobs in them, a couple of which Stinger turns to inform me have been thoroughly debunked already. Eventually, they shift to a ‘reverse Q&A session’ where Henry begins asking the audience questions and promises prizes for the best answers.

“If aliens landed on the White House lawn who should we send to greet them?” he asks. The correct response in this case ends up being Samuel L. Jackson. I would send Keanu, but this is a rapid-fire exercise. It becomes a welcome contest to see who can make everyone else laugh the hardest.

I briefly feel bad for anyone missing what is my favorite part of the conference, but I see it’s clearly not for everyone. I’m so thankful they decided to come to Contact in the Desert and decide I will happily attempt to return if they attend again next year.

Thomas Jane is standing barefoot at a podium, delivering the most comprehensive and well-presented lecture I end up seeing the entire weekend. He only recently became a public figure in the UFO community, but it’s clear he’s been studying it extensively for several years. Surprisingly, he doesn’t mention any of his personal experiences in this lecture either, but it doesn’t affect the value of his presentation.

He goes deep into elements of game theory and hypothesizes how it may correlate to non-human intelligence (NHI) interactions or intentions in relation to humanity. He covers several notable experiencer accounts and even artfully acknowledges the growing convergence of systemic issues. After the presentation Stinger and I agree his is likely the one presentation worth sharing with others outside the event.

When it’s over a group of people line up to approach Thomas for selfies and accolades. I commit to waiting until everyone else is finished, but he leaves early and I sense I’ve missed my window. I mill around and then sort of opportunistically follow him on his way out of the venue. He’s polite and shakes my hand. I suggest he do a Reddit AMA to promote his upcoming book. He listens patiently until I give him my card and we part ways.

I’m standing with someone I just met as they’re confessing their story of a personal UFO sighting. They’re uncomfortable telling other people for fear of sounding crazy, so I’m trying my best to be supportive. I remind them we’re at a conference filled with the most receptive group of people possible to their experience, but they still seem reticent.

Their experience involves them seeing a series of orbs floating above a tree in their backyard at night only a few days ago, but it was very brief and they were the only witness. They’re unable to easily explain it, but it’s also not well demonstrative of the five observables or exhibits such extreme features as to fully turn heads. They seem to be struggling with some ontological shock, despite being well versed in the subject matter. I suggest they attend one of the daily experiencer group meetings at the conference. I’ve been incredibly curious about what goes on in these groups, but I’m not an experiencer myself and have no intentions of intruding upon them.

During this conversation, I’m reminded of Richard Dolan’s remarks from earlier in the day where he posits how many genuine UFO sightings occur globally on the regular. By his metrics, there are likely around 50,000 unique sightings each year around the world. There are multiple US organizations to report to, but most countries have nothing and thus no data to offer. Most people also still seem unwilling to ever report their sighting for fear of ridicule or criticism from their community.

In speaking with this person I realize I’ve taken for granted the extent to which I’ve felt the stigma lessening, as it’s obviously still strong enough to hinder even those in the most forgiving of scenarios.

I’m in the smallest conference room for Adam Curry’s presentation and struggle to find a seat since it’s standing-room only. His presentation explores the nature of AI, the scientific basis for precognition and PSI, and his upcoming venture into crowd-sourcing future predictions using an app called Entangled.

I saw him give a similar presentation at Contact in the Desert in 2017, but his app didn’t even have a name at that time. It’s interesting to see how it’s taken several years for him to get it off the ground, but he claims it will be available for download in July.

The app will involve opting into a process where users act as a form of local, random number generators which can then be leveraged in the aggregate to help study the nature of consciousness. He seems excited to be so close to finally launching it, but it has some highly technical aspects and it’s difficult to tell if it will succeed, much less what it might cost. Afterwards, I commit to keeping an eye on it once it comes out.

I was unfamiliar with Dannion Brinkley before seeing him this year at the conference, despite considering myself fairly interested in accounts of Near Death Experiences (NDEs). I enjoyed his brief comments on a separate panel so much I decided to attend his talk, Aliens and Near Death Experiences.

Dannion had his first of multiple NDEs in 1975 before Raymond Moody officially coined the term later that year. Two lightning strikes, two open heart surgeries, and a brain surgery all led him to accumulate multiple NDEs and a profoundly unique set of perspectives on death as a result. He’s also been a prominent hospice volunteer and has been with over two thousand people through their death process.

“I wish all of you would die. It’s just never gonna happen,” he says coyly and the audience laughs. He claims there’s no such thing as death and has an abrupt, but contagious sense of humor about him. Oddly, his talk doesn’t feature much about aliens at all; he focuses more on his personal experiences of the afterlife and spiritual philosophy.

He regularly breaks to instruct us to just breathe for a moment. He repeats this exercise often, along with the notion we are all great and powerful spiritual beings, with dignity, direction, and purpose. He describes the concept of the life review after death in detail, a common feature of NDEs, and says we will get to become every person we’ve ever encountered throughout our lives, seeing our choices through everyone else’s perspective.

He’s invigorating and enthusiastic about life in a refreshing way. I end up willing to dismiss some of his out-of-place prophetic projections and scientific views in light of how insightful other aspects of his talk are.

I first encountered Adam Apollo in 2014 when he gave a talk at Burning Man and I’ve taken multiple opportunities to see him speak since. He’s an experiencer, physicist, and has spawned an impressive array of companies and projects. His personal story is unique and I found this talk fascinating, despite some side-eyed glances from Stinger during it before he decided to opt out.

His presentation was called The Science of Starfleet, which was just a friendlier name for the same presentation he has been building upon for several years and covers his model of reality. The talk deals with the nature of consciousness, spacetime, and Adam’s attempts to integrate recent developments in physics into a unified harmonic matrix. An older, but public version of his presentation at the conference can be found here, for reference. I learn he has a book related to his personal experiences coming out later this year titled The Dragon Key: Memoirs of a Galactic Guardian, which I will be looking out for.

Stinger and I are lying in a circle with a hundred other participants, deep into a CE5 group meditation. It’s a form of exercise in which one attempts to facilitate human-initiated contact with non-human intelligence, either individually or with others. It’s the fourth day of the conference and we thought it would be a relaxing way to end the evening with the minuscule chance of something interesting showing up. It ends up being a ridiculous place to try stargazing, but it’s the nicest patch of grass near the conference that could accommodate such a large group of people.

Stinger has been acting as my anchor of rationality throughout the weekend, his skeptical eye being significantly larger than my own. We both have sudden moments of the autokinetic effect while staring upwards, but aren’t seeing any UFOs yet.

Initially, we all joined hands, spoke some affirmations (‘I love you’, ‘I forgive you’, etc.), and were then thoroughly smudged before being guided to lay down and start broadcasting our intentions for contact towards the sky. The host guided our thoughts and then eventually began relaying what others were seeing or experiencing throughout the circle. I quickly began to realize how rarely I take time to just look at the sky, much less meditate in unison with a group of eccentric, like-minded people.

The only significant thing we observe aside from a repeating flock of birds flying overhead is a litany of commercial jets and contrails. A shaman spoke to each of us briefly beforehand and indicated I would need to ‘open my throat chakra tonight’, as others would ‘want to hear what I would have to say’. Unfortunately, I end up using this affirmation only to yell at an older gentleman next to us who won’t silence his cell phone after the twentieth time it goes off.

We recognize him as the same gentleman who has been standing in the Q&A lines at multiple panels and (rather than having a question) would direct everyone to go outside later that night to see a real UFO he proclaimed was definitely coming. Audience members would excitedly yell back for details, but he would just casually reply with things like ‘outside the hotel’ and ‘at dark’ as though he wasn’t expecting clarifying questions.

He was recording extensively during the meditation and verbalizing many things he was seeing which I never managed to pick out or corroborate. I was polite in addressing him at first but was forced to yell when it became apparent he was very hard of hearing. 

Suddenly, the man on the microphone says some people are seeing a large spaceship starting to descend slowly overhead. Stinger and I are squinting furiously, but we aren’t seeing anything. Unfortunately, I am either blind or these beings are only willing to let themselves be seen by a subset of the participants. Either way, I find myself mentally looking for an exit. I nudge Stinger and we leave before the session is officially finished.

It’s the last day of the conference and the final presentation we’re attending is an intensive with Richard Dolan titled Alien Behaviors & Intentions. Paul Hynek takes the stage to introduce him and begins reading directly from his cell phone. It’s Richard’s bio, but he seems confused and pauses in the middle of it. He then says he’s waiting for ChatGPT to load its response; he asked it for a bio of Richard only moments before stepping up to the podium.

Paul makes light of the interruption and the audience seems to still consider his attempt magical enough that they are willing to completely overlook how unprofessional it comes across. Richard is standing behind him but seems playfully unperturbed. I realize here I should just accept this is the way things are with AI in the wild these days, regardless of how some people will choose to use it.

Richard informs us he feels under the weather, but he appears to be rallying. He then mentions he heard there was a CE5 event last night where people claimed to have seen a genuine UFO. I’m thankful I went if only to confirm this was not the case for some of those who attended. I’m struck by how frustrating this would have sounded in the reverse, had I not gone, and then had to wonder about it after the fact. Richard is pleasantly agnostic about the claims and indicates he has yet to participate in a CE5 exercise himself, despite being deeply immersed in the UFO culture.

He then gives a flowing, two-hour presentation on the implied nature of the various beings most frequently reported in the most significant experiencer cases and a comprehensive overview of their possible motivations, based on certain factors.

Aliens appear to be engaging in a wide range of activities globally. Sightings and encounters are reported across all continents, and all types of environments, which suggests a high level of interest in Earth and its diversity. Some involve benign or curious interactions, others are invasive or traumatic. This range suggests a broad interest in human behavior and biology and implies there is some form of plan, purpose, or endgame; their actions do not appear to be random.

There is also an aspect of stealth. Most activity occurs at night and is carried out in a manner that avoids widespread detection and clear understanding. Many indicate an awareness of us and a development of strategies for acting covertly. Richard gives Dan Sherman’s story a welcome shout-out. However, there are enough sightings and encounters to suggest a degree of openness or tolerance for potential discovery either within a spectrum or via alternative factions. This could also indicate that they occasionally make mistakes. Travis Walton’s case comes to mind in this regard, where it appears as though he was harmed by a craft, taken for several days, and then repaired before being returned home.

Richard thinks the Extraterrestrial Hypothesis (ETH) is the most logical theory from his point of view, which states these Others are from elsewhere in the universe. This is in contrast to others in his position who pose the Interdimensional Hypothesis (IDH), which he says could be present, he’s just not sure how it works exactly. In any case, they are clearly of very high neurological complexity and likely intimidating intelligence.

He emphasizes that they are here, largely acting clandestine, and give every indication they have the ability to infiltrate our structures of power inherent to civilization. He also sees humanity as clearly moving towards a totalitarian power structure. He indicates there are some things we could do to prevent such a shift, but it appears inexorable.

“When you look at the globally elite power system that we serve, it’s difficult for me to see through that to where we have a utopia; Where we can all play nice in the sandbox.”

Afterward, I end up with more questions than answers, despite being familiar with many of the cases and books he mentioned. The seemingly paradoxical convergence of forces inherent to the phenomenon, disclosure, and human systems easily prevents one from fully squaring this circle.

It’s a few hours later and I’m now a hundred miles north of Indian Wells, lying down with a large group of people in a dome-shaped building called the Integratron. The building is a strange fusion of art, science, and magic built by George Van Tassel, a prominent figure in the early UFO movement. He was directed to build the structure after an encounter with beings from Venus one night in 1953.

We’re here getting a ‘sound bath’ which involves someone playing a series of crystal singing bowls while we meditate nearby. The resonance flowing from the bowls and bouncing throughout the room makes it feel as though the sounds are reverberating through my head, pushing me toward the edge of a misophonic implosion. It lasts for about twenty minutes before we stand up and then join hands to do some brief chanting. The resonance is more subtle in this exercise, but afterward we’re allowed to walk around and experiment freely.

It’s a relaxing experience, contrasted by the extremely long and thorough presentation we sat through previously by our host on something called Sonic Geometry. It’s a form of sacred geometry that focuses on the math inherent to geometric structures and their interactions with sound. We were unsure what to expect since this was technically a private event for the conference attendees, but his talk was only loosely connected to the Integratron and we missed out on hearing a more in-depth tale of the building’s history. Fortunately, it ends up being a good experience and an opportunity for me to connect with friends on our last day together.

I’m rushing to pack my things so I can make it to Oceanside, California before it gets much darker. A close friend is staying there and I refuse to pass by this close without visiting them. I give some farewells to my fellow mods and then begin winding through the desert mountains. It’s not long before I’m met with a sense of loneliness and lingering uncertainty.

I realize even if I didn’t relate directly to many of the people at the conference (mostly those fawning over the colored rocks) I was amidst minds who were asking many of the same questions I find myself deeply focused on. What is going on out there? Where is humanity heading? Who else is still waiting or too afraid to come forward with their story, the implications of which could change what we think is possible?

I’ve spent five full days quietly fixated on people who have risen towards the top of this field and who are asking similar questions, but I’m acutely aware they remain largely unanswered. Presumably, many others went unnoticed as well, who are still waiting for the right moment or the right person to share their own story with. The pressure and implications run so deep that I feel like reality is poised to burst at the seams at any moment, even if most people seem entirely unaware of it.

I leave with the sense there is much more work to be done, individually and collectively, if we intend to face many of the biggest mysteries and challenges looming on the horizon. I’m immensely grateful I was granted the time and opportunity this weekend to make a few new friends  I can confront these with.

If you’re interested in viewing any of the presentations from the conference you can purchase them here.